


To heal

by huffspuffsblows



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: F/M, Shmoop, mention of past rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 05:10:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16528019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/huffspuffsblows/pseuds/huffspuffsblows
Summary: To healYou have to get to the rootOf the woundAnd kiss it all the way up-- Rupi KaurJessica and Max have a moment after, and after, and after.





	To heal

  


Life goes on. It doesn’t stop for anyone no matter how much you plead, no matter how hard you dig your heels in just for a moment, a single breath to get a grip. At the same time it’s not a bad thing. Dwelling is as good as drowning, nowhere near each other in the dictionary but might as well be intertwined.

Lunch money still needs to be distributed, interns need to be directed, buttholes do not need to be photographed, wayward boys need to be shepherded in and out like a revolving door. And occasionally work needs to be done; all in a day’s work.

[there were times that first year when she couldn’t leave the house let alone the bed; only the screams of her child sent her running]

[heart rattled in her spine where mercury took place of bone, ready to spill upon her enemies]

[she once asked Ash how he got over it

And regretted and was grateful for his answer all at once]

Jessica still awakens with wet eyes and a scream-hoarse throat sometimes. It takes a few moments to realize she’s here, it( will never be)’s fine, the fingers around her wrist are not to restrain her, but to ground her.

Max always looks back at her any time he catches her looking. In all their time apart, they still face each other when they curl their bodies together for sleep. These moments are no different.

There are no words between them, she need only reach for him and his arms wrap around her. His heartbeat jumps where its pressed against her shirt, for her fear, fear for her.

[or maybe it’s her heart, they’ve shared a heartbeat for so long]

He cups her face, [palms roughened by the pen more than the sword] his own eyes shimmering with tears, and there’s no speaking for the fireworks when their mouths meet. You just kind of have to be there.

Jessica takes his hands in hers, entwines their fingers, guides his through her hair, along the soft shape of her face, squeezes his fingers above her squeezing heart.

“I want to make fun of you for being cheesy so badly right now,” Max mutters softly, mouth tilted up. Ruins the moment as usual.There’s nothing but adoration in his eyes, and though Jessica huffs, she doesn’t pull away either.

“Do and die,” is answered half heartedly, fond.

He plucks her t-shirt between two fingers to lift it up, her skin tingles from the electricity in the air. Adoration skates across his fingers, pours from his lips where they trace a lightning storm across her collarbones to her guiding heart.

From beneath his lashes he looks at her, really looks at her, and in the next moment between breaths he pulls her shirt down over her skin, over his head, and burrows between her breasts.  
“MAX!” Jessica shrieks, then stifles herself with outrage and giggles all in one. He noses at her skin, arms never once left her.

“Shhhh, go sleepy. I’m here. S’fine,” he murmurs, muffled and sure, and the liquid mercury of her spine, ready to destroy utterly to every cell, settles.

Jessica doesn’t quite tremble, doesn’t quake like the earth between tectonic plates. She bends, rubs the top of his hair through the neck of her shirt, and if her hot tears land on him, he doesn’t say anything.

“Don’t suffocate down there, idiot. If you die with a hard on, I refused to be called a hard ass at your funeral.”

Somehow he wriggles closer, if he could pass through her skin and climb inside he would, and turns them on their sides, facing one another, always.

“What a way to die,” another muffled hum against her chest. Her arms lock around his neck, half to strangle him, half a hug, entirely _I love you I love you I love you_.


End file.
